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The Top 5 Black Men That Shouldn’t Be Your Role Model!

Someone asked me recently to write about my views on BLACK MEN and Manhood. That particular topic could spawn 100+ posts alone because there are so many levels to unwrap. But I do think I can sum up those “traits” that real BLACK MEN should avoid at all cost.

To do that I have picked 5 BLACK MEN that have something about them that we should never know anything about. Check out this list below:

5 Raymond Lewis

“Plays Both Sides”

Image result for Ray Lewis protest

Have you ever heard the phrase “If you dont stand for anything you stand for nothing” This phrase sums up Mr. Lewis quite well. Pick a side bruh!!!

Raymond Lewis is a topic in barber shops across America. I wont get into the adjectives used to describe the brother but here’s the story as it stands today.

Many NFL fans were surprised to see ex-Baltimore Ravens star Ray Lewis join his former team  to kneel with them during the national anthem. Many assumed Lewis, who has criticized Colin Kaepernick’s decision to kneel during the anthem to protest racial injustice in the United States, dropped down on both knees to show unity in the face of divisive and incendiary comments made by President Trump about protesters in the NFL.

It turns out that wasn’t the case, however. As Lewis made clear in a passionate exchange on Showtime’s “Inside the NFL” that his decision to join his former team on the field and kneel during the anthem was to “simply honor God in the midst of chaos.”

See exactly what he said here:

Now bruh I have no issue with you wanting to pray and whatever but don’t fawk up what these REAL MEN and WOMAN are trying to accomplish. It is okay that you love football more than being black but remember it was us “black” folk who were behind you when you were charged with murder.

 

N363833 01: Baltimore Ravens Pro Bowl linebacker Ray Lewis during his first appearance in Atlanta Municipal Court in Atlanta, Georgia on February 1, 2000. Lewis was charged with murder in the stabbing of two men during post Super Bowl celebration early Monday, January 31, in the Buckhead neighborhood of Atlanta. (Photo by Liaison Agency)

 

The bottom line is this. Brothers and Sisters if you don’t agree with the work that folk are putting in complain in the comforts of your own home. Our initiatives can’t survive with open decisiveness from those with the biggest platforms. Choose a side, stick with it and don’t back down when the consequences come a calling!

4 Suge (Sugar) Knight

“Bully”

Image result for suge knight

Almost every black person you know grew up around a Sugar Knight type Bully, Big, Ugly, Mean and destined to die or end up in jail at a young age.

Here is a list of Sugars “Bullying” Tactics and Consequences (I know the list is long, skip to the end and you will still get the point):

  • In October 1987, Knight was arrested for domestic violence after he assaulted his girlfriend and cut off her ponytail on the street.
  • On October 31, 1987, Knight was arrested in Las Vegas, Nevada for auto theft, carrying a concealed weapon and attempted murder. He had allegedly shot a man three times while stealing his car. He pleaded guilty to a misdemeanor charge, and received two years probation.
  • In 1996, Knight was sent to prison for a probation violation and in February 1997 was sentenced to nine years in prison. He was released on August 6, 2001.
  • In 2003 he was sent to prison again for violating parole when he struck a parking lot attendant. Death Row Records’ income rapidly declined due to Knight’s incarceration. It managed to save itself from complete bankruptcy by releasing archived Snoop Dogg compilation albums and posthumous Tupac albums. Despite signing new artists, Knight never released any of their albums.
  • In 2006 Knight was engaged in another dispute with former friend and ex-associate Snoop Dogg after Snoop insulted him in an interview with Rolling Stone magazine.
  • On May 10, 2008, Knight was involved in an altercation involving a monetary dispute outside of a nightclub in Hollywood. He was knocked out for 3 minutes, taken to the hospital, and reportedly did not cooperate with the Los Angeles Police Department (LAPD).
  • On August 27, 2008, Knight was arrested on drug and aggravated assault charges after leaving a Las Vegas strip club. When police arrived on the scene, Knight was beating his girlfriend of three years, Melissa Isaac, and brandishing a knife. Reports also alleged that he was under the influence of both ecstasy and hydrocodone.
  • As part of an October 30, 2008 bankruptcy claim, Knight also filed a lawsuit against Kanye West and his associates. The lawsuit concerns an August 2005 shooting at West’s pre-Video Music Awards party, where Knight was wounded by a gunshot to the upper leg.The lawsuit cites damages of mental and physical pain caused by the shooting, costs of surgery, loss of income and the theft of a 15-carat (3.0 g) US$147,000 diamond earring.
  • In February 2009, Knight was taken to Scottsdale Healthcare Osborn to be treated for face injuries he received during an altercation at a private party in the W Scottsdale Hotel, where Knight was reportedly punched by Robert L. Carnes Jr. after exchanging words with him.
  • On February 8, 2012, Knight was arrested in Las Vegas, after police found marijuana in his car and several warrants for prior traffic violations.
  • On August 24, 2014, Knight was shot at a pre-Video Music Awards party hosted by Chris Brown in Los Angeles. Although shot six times, he was able to walk from the venue to an ambulance. His injuries required surgery.
  • On October 29, 2014, Knight and comedian Katt Williams were arrested for the theft of a camera from photographer Leslie Redden in an incident which occurred in Beverly Hills on September 5. Both men were charged with second degree robbery.
  • On January 29, 2015, Knight was involved in a hit-and-run incident that left one man dead and another hospitalized in Compton, California. Knight turned himself in to the Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Department early the next morning and was arrested on suspicion of murder. Killed was Terry Carter, co-founder of Heavyweight Records and a friend of Knight. The second victim, filmmaker Cle Sloan, suffered a mangled foot and head injuries.Witnesses claim that Knight followed the men after an argument on the Straight Outta Compton film set to a burger stand parking lot, and that the collision looked intentional.
  • According to Eminem‘s bodyguard, who is known as Big Naz, Knight allegedly tried to have Eminem killed.
  • On August 2, 2017, he was indicted for threatening to murder F. Gary Gray, the director of Straight Outta Compton.

 

The reason why you shouldn’t want to be a bully should be evident by Sugar Knights run ins with the law and near deaths. The UNIVERSE always finds a way to deal with bullies. They are almost always dealt with. For you; a young black man that means you will either die young or spend a lot of time in jail. DONT!!!

3 Orenthal James “O. J.” Simpson

“Uncle Tom”

The term “Uncle Tom” is used as a derogatory epithet for an excessively subservient person, particularly when that person perceives their own lower-class status based on race. It is similarly used to negatively describe a person who betrays their own group by participating in its oppression, whether or not they do so willingly.The term has also, with more intended neutrality, been applied in psychology in the form “Uncle Tom syndrome“, a term for the use of subservience, appeasement and passivity to cope with intimidation and threats.

The transgressions of OJ have been well documented and I wont rehash any of that here. But his love hate relationship with the black community is best depicted in the HBO 30 for 30 special OJ Made in America (Click here) on Espn.  Well loved by the black community in the 80s and 90s OJ chose to dissociate himself with us to further his “American Dream”.

When the opportunities came for OJ to join other athletes in protest for our rights he stayed out of it in order to continue to cultivate his white relationships. Subsequently he thought his social status, fancy Brentwood address and celebrity status made him immune to being a black man in America.

And every time he has faced legal troubles he has turned to the black community for support. He is lucky we are the most forgiving people on earth. We should be done with him by now but I doubt that we are.

OKAY!!!

2 Ray Rice

“Woman Beater”

Do I even need to explain? Just watch this video and don’t do anything like this EVER! ( I will do a full post on this subject later)

1 Sheriff David Clarke

“EVIL”

So I am not the type of man who reacts off of what people on social media say. Well I mean I react but I like to react with my own opinion formed by a bit of research. So when I first heard folk call this dude a coon and uncle tom all over the internet. But i gave him the benefit of the doubt and did a little bit of research.

And you know what?

He  IS  A  FAWKING  COOON!!! 

He is the worst kind too. Ole black negro with decades of experience in probably the most racist police department in the country. Do you guys know that this dude is out here calling for HARDER sentences on petty drug crimes. Check this out:

I saw this dude and instantly realized that there is something we don’t know about him! (shout out to Solluminati)

And then I saw THIS!!!!

This was an excellent video by the way but I wanna let yall in on something….

….. Did yall know that this fool did all of this just to get famous????

I dont like this dude. I think if I saw him we’d have to throw hands. (Im only serious)

And then there was this

His opportunistic ass has found his way over to nestle up under the bosom of masta. And is probably now getting ready to  reap his vengeance on the negros that bullied him when he was a child. Be warned my brothers and sistas. This dude here is TROUBLE!

 

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Let me put you on to something!

My G, I saw the most amazing thing last night. I watched this video and it instantly blew my mind and made me want to do better. This video was of a group of women dancing in some secret studio in heaven. And they were dancing to a song that I love by my musical persona the R&B General Tank. Ok I will leave you in suspense no longer, here is the video!

This video was produced by the DYNAMIC Ayila Janell (the fly girl in the middle at the beginning) Now I know you can respect what you just saw. I mean my head exploded about five times during the video. First of all the song choice was right on point with the routine (I bet you didn’t realize they all were doing the same dance routine!). The way they were dressed was all the way 21st century sexy dancer. And the dancers themselves were the best things I’ve ever seen. But the routine itself!!!

NI&&A!!! (Yeah I use the word, I will explain in another post)

I think that’s what we need, fellas. If you can get you a woman that will do that for you when you need it you need to let her be herself and do what she wants to do. And you need to do the cooking and dishes.

Seduction and Sensuality are things that may be missing a lot in our homes; But I know our woman want to have that skill in tow but we have to let them be themselves and open up.  We have to allow them to feel sexy and do sexy things. And then they will do those Seductive and Sensual things that we want. Don’t be a regular dude bruh, be adventurous, spontaneous and flexible for your woman and she will be those things for you.

See some more of these fantastic videos Here:

Ayila Janell

or

Nicole Kirkland

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A Call to Action

The last time I tried this I failed horribly. I think I got a bit too preachy (black folk don’t like to be preached to unless they are at church!). So this time I will try my best to keep my words to a minimum.

We definitely have a lot of shit going on in this country right now, don’t we? I mean shit we are kneeling and praying during national anthems, we are boycotting football, putting our CSI experience to use, coon marking, surviving natural disasters, a Manchurian candidate shot up Vegas and the POLICE are still killing us in cold blood.

So I can understand why we would be a bit distracted from what we should be focused on, which is….

….making our communities whole.

Colin Kaepernick’s sacrifice has been on our minds almost daily since the NFL season began. Not only did he risk his job by taking a stand. He also has continuously put his money and time to use and has been putting in work within the community( Click here for more on that) . Lets try following his example of selflessness.

There are indeed folk within our communities that are putting in actual work! They don’t spend their time arguing on Facebook. They have created programs and opportunities for countless individuals and families.

So I want to help us get back on track.

In my experience it has been better to get involved with an organization at its inception. That has allowed me to push my agenda upfront; which is always to put my people on.

Here are some organizations from EVERY city that I have lived in that I know could use your time, sponsorship and donations. Some of these organizations have made me the man I am today. Some I have been a part of from a voluntary standpoint and others from within leadership. They all struggle every year just to exist.

Help me help them.

District of Columbia

  • DMV

Black Lives Matter – #BlackLivesMatter is working for a world where Black lives are no longer systematically and intentionally targeted for demise. We affirm our contributions to this society, our humanity, and our resilience in the face of deadly oppression.  We have put our sweat equity and love for Black people into creating a political project–taking the hashtag off of social media and into the streets. The call for Black lives to matter is a rallying cry for ALL Black lives striving for liberation.

What Does #BlackLivesMatter Mean?

When we say Black Lives Matter, we are broadening the conversation around state violence to include all of the ways in which Black people are intentionally left powerless at the hands of the state.  We are talking about the ways in which Black lives are deprived of our basic human rights and dignity.

Website: http://blacklivesmatter.com/

To donate: Donate Here

To volunteer:  http://blacklivesmatter.com/getinvolved/

Florida

  • Palm Bay, Florida

Palm Bay Youth Athletic Association – The Palm Bay Youth Athletic Association (PBYAA) is an organization that provides athletic opportunities for young people. Our goal is to introduce, teach, and develop the fundamentals of football & cheerleading to our local youth as well as to promote good sportsmanship, teamwork, and healthy competition.

PBYAA is a non-profit organization of parents and local citizens that has come together to provide football and cheerleading experience for the youth of our community. All money goes to support team supplies and activities. This is a combination organization supporting both football and cheerleading activities.

Website: http://www.palmbayfootball.org/

To donate: Donate Here

Illinois

  • Chicago, Illinois

Tuskegee Next – The Mission: Honoring the legacy of the Tuskegee Airman, Tuskegee Next seeks to transforms the lives of at risk youth through aviation education and career path opportunities, so they can transform their communities.

Our Strategy: Tuskegee Next seeks to provide role models and a clear path toward aviation careers through: Flight Training, Life Skills, and Educational Assistance.

The Goal: The goal is to get 100 young men and women their private pilots licenses in 10 years.

Website: http://www.tuskegeenext.org/#future1

To donate: http://www.tuskegeenext.org/donate/

To volunteer: http://www.tuskegeenext.org/connect/

Aerostars – The mission of the AeroStars Aviation Exploration Apprenticeship (A2EA) After School Matters Program is to provide leadership development to students by enhancing the academic awareness of the applied sciences through fun, hands-on demonstration. Our objectives are to teach students about the history and importance of aerospace technology in our everyday lives, expose students to the vast array of career opportunities within the aerospace industry, assist students in attaining the skills necessary to participate and lead in the next generation of Science, Technology, Engineering and Math (STEM) innovations, and support students interested in pursuing a career path in any particular area. Lead by the dynamic Tammera Holmes.

Website: http://www.aerostarcorp.com/index.html

To donate: Donate Here

To volunteer aai@avioninstitute.org

New York

  • Brookhaven, Long Island NY

Boys and Girls Club of BELLPORT AREA – Here at the Boys & Girls Club we are looking towards the future – the future of our members.

The Club offers programs that impact the lives of our members in vital areas such as academic success, good character and citizenship, and healthy lifestyles. These programs and activities help youth thrive. Young people need to know that someone cares about them and we are here to support them in every aspect of their lives.

No matter how one participates – a volunteer, a mentor, a tutor, a donor, a staff member – collectively we make a difference. We can all put children on the path to a great future.

Website: https://www.bgcbellport.org/

To donate: https://www.bgcbellport.org/donate/

To volunteer: https://www.bgcbellport.org/volunteer/

  • Brooklyn, New York

Boys Hope Girls Hope – Operating a college preparatory boarding program in Brooklyn, NY, BHGHNY has a mission to help academically capable and motivated children from at-risk situations meet their full potential and become men and women for others by providing them with the safe and stable living environment, academic support, and guidance they need to finish high school, graduate from college, and become responsible and productive citizens.

Website: http://bhghinternational.org/

To donate: http://bhghny.org/donate.php

To volunteer: http://www.bhghny.org/displaysection.php?sid=4

Boys Hope Girls Hope

  • Syracuse, New York

Southwest Community Center – Man, this place is an institution in Syracuse. They have probably had a hand in the lives of 70% of the African Americans in the community. I love that place. With Bongos and B&B’s across the street. I just love it all!

You could go to the Southwest Center and play basketball, be in a play, learn how to cook, read, write and listen, work, learn to swim, get married and help the community.

Please help Aunt Tracie and the crew ensure that they continue to be a pillar in our community.

Website: http://smnfswcc.org/

To donate: http://smnfswcc.org/#donate-tab

To volunteer: http://smnfswcc.org/#contact-tab

Precious Lily & Brotherhood Foundation – a program ran by new City Councilwoman Latoya Allen is a mentor program located in Syracuse, NY. They focus on the importance of education and empowerment throughout our community. They host family events throughout the year and also teach our children the importance of giving back. They encourage our children to participate in the active process of making our city a better place to live.

To donate: paypal.me/AllenEndeavor

To volunteer: lallenpride@yahoo.com

As you can see the majority of the organizations listed are tailored to the youth. I know there are countless organizations out there doing work for ALL of us. And because I am not all knowing I need your help.

Please help me compile that list of those organizations in your city that are putting in work and need help. Using the template that I have established above, let us know in the comments the organization, city, a brief description, address, website, etc…

If you don’t have all the information that is fine, I will work to fill in the blanks.

Lets cut out the twitter fingers and start putting in actual work folk!!!

This illustration sums up the most what a lot of us are doing these days:

Do Something!!!

Please Share

Thank You

 

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New Music Alert – Lovers by DJ Kash

 

One of my favorite Disc Jockeys, DJ Kash was the DJ at school who did all the best parties. He also was one of the first, if not THE first to bring Caribbean riddems to the A! Now with the influence and respect from legends like Grandmaster Flash and Kid Capri he is currently killing the airwaves of Atlanta’s WHTA (HOT 107.9 FM) and sharing the bet awards stage with Rae Sremmurd; DJ Kash has proven himself a leader in the art of Djing.

Check out his website

https://www.djkashatl.com/

 

Here is his first single it is 🔥 🔥 🔥 🔥- LOVERS featuring Kaleena Harper and Wyclef Jean:

 

 

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Top 5 Reasons Why You Should Only Choose A Black Woman (Part 1)

 

Image result for solange wedding pic

I am not against interracial relationships (I would like to get that out up front). You should be able to choose whomever you want. However I do believe that one of our main issues in this country is the erosion of the black family and community. The reason behind that erosion is well documented, so I will not get into it here. However having said that, if you chose a women that is not of our race it is in my humble opinion a SELFISH act.

I know I know using the word SELFISH in this context seems a bit harsh. But it is not if you understand what the word means. Selfish – characterized by or manifesting concern or care for oneself. “Oneself”. Being a better black man is never about “oneself”. Choosing an “other” because her hair is straight, she isn’t difficult to handle, she stays in her place, etc… is all about YOU and nothing else. Stop being selfish bruh and grow a pair.

I also believe that to repair the damage done to our families/communities it will take an awful lot of SELFLESS actions. One of which should be to choose a black woman. Although that isn’t my main reason that YOU should choose a black woman. That has everything to do with HER and what SHE has done for YOU. Here are my top FIVE reason why YOU should choose a BLACK WOMAN:

1. She is becoming the most educated demographic in the country

  • According to the National Center of Education Statistics there are currently more black women enrolled in college than any other demographic (9.7%).
  • They are twice as more likely to actually graduate from college then YOU are.

Check it out for yourself here: National Center of Education Statistics, Degrees conferred by race and sex

2. Choosing her helps the community

  • Surprisingly our communities are not as strong as they were pre civil rights era. This is due in part to our strong family ties that were extremely matriarchal. Since then both the family and community has eroded. According to the U.S. Census Bureau only 39% of OUR children are growing up with both parents in the household (The percentage of white children is 74%). Just imagine how much better off we would be if both parents raised the majority of our children. I bet both the child and the community would be a lot better off.

Image result for Black Family

 3. She comes in every FLAVOR you can dream of!

  • Some guys choose others for their “exotic” looks, lighter complexions, etc…, thinking that they are better
  • The picture below says it all
  • There is nothing more “exotic” than a black woman. Go get you one!

 4. They are the new standard of beauty

  • Have you taken a look at social media these days? Everywhere you look there are “others” coloring their skin, enhancing their butts, lips, etc..
  • The models, TV and movie stars, etc… Are getting thicker.
  • And just go to this IG group and tell me I am wrong!

IG pages – @adoringblackwomen, @darkskinwomen

5. She has always been there for us

Image result for Black women and family during slavery

  • Our history began on this continent in 1619, when the first ships laden with West African men, women and children arrived in the colonies. A time when they tried to take from us our very identities as human. It was she who told our stories through the generations. It was she who made sure YOU kept your rhythm. She held our families together like NOBODY ELSE COULD.
  • After the age of slavery, while we were off fighting or building the white man’s war machine. It was her who made sure the children were fed. She was there when we returned home. She stood by our side like NOBODY ELSE DID.
  • During the Civil Rights movement she stood on the front lines with us, helped us remain organized, supported our ambitions and also held our families together like NOBODY ELSE DARED.
  • She stood by you when you couldn’t get that factory job and chose to take a chance by selling drugs. She held the family together whilst your wayward ambitions took you away from them like NOBODY ELSE WOULD.
  • She continues to be the only one that you can rely on when you are at your worst and she is just waiting for you to choose her when you become your best…

See a lot of men believe our women of color to be “Difficult”. But what they fail to understand is that our women have been dealing with us and our bullshit for centuries. If you don’t believe that every black women you know carries with her the shared experiences of her ancestors within herself intrinsically you know nothing! So by the time she starts dating one of us she already understands our centuries of baggage. She grows up seeing how we treat our women and expect the same. Then when she dates of few of us we dog her, just as she expected. So by the time YOU reach her at 35 she has not only been born with those centuries of innate hurt. She is then hurt repeatedly by us all 35 YEARS of her life. SO OF COURSE SHE IS DIFFICULT BITCH!!! ( I will take my hands off my hips now lol)

But the “others” weren’t born with the centuries of baggage we have. See their history with us is oh so brief. And that is why sir THEY DON’T DESERVE YOUR LOVE. They just haven’t earned it yet.

I will get into that final point more in part two of this series.

Thank You for your time

Are you ready to be a better man? Fuck with me then!

#Bebetterthanthem

 

 

 

 

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Black Men and Education (Bad Teachers)

This post in particular is for my YOUNG BOYS out there currently in school (Shouts out to SoLLUMINATI).

A common complaint I hear from our young boys that are struggling in school is that they are getting a bad grade in a class because the teacher is bad. They’d say, “I don’t understand what Ms. Smith is saying”, “Ms. Johnson doesn’t know what she is talking about” or my favorite; “Nobody else is passing either” (shout out to Mr. Barkers Airport Management Class).

I remember my young self-saying a lot of those same things in Mrs. Dupuy’s Spanish class (Yo no Hablo espanol). And I also remember at a young age to stop using that as an excuse for failure and that there just might also be other reasons why I couldn’t follow what was going on in those Spanish classes.

You see I know there are definitely some bad teachers out there, but most aren’t. I know for certain each and every one of those non bad teachers out there want every single one of their students to succeed. But no matter how good any teacher is someone will fall through the cracks. And that’s why teachers are taught to create lesson plans designed to make sure that those students down the middle make it through (my opinion, argue with me!). And those students at the top and the bottom have to figure something else out.

I was probably a higher level student. But I was failing Spanish class. My typical last-minute studying wasn’t working for a language class. This failure lead me to research learning styles. And as soon as I realized what my learning style was I never failed another class. I want you to do that same exercise and learn what you need to know to ensure YOU never fail again. Here is a list of the Seven Learning Styles:

The Seven Learning Styles (For more information on each individual learning style, click the styles name)

  • Visual: You prefer using pictures, images, and spatial understanding.👁👁
  • Auditory: You prefer using sound and music.🎧🎤
  • Verbal: You prefer using words, both in speech and writing.🗣✍🏿
  • Physical : You prefer using your body, hands and sense of touch.👏🏾👋🏿
  • Logical: You prefer using logic, reasoning and systems. 🤔🤔🤔
  • Social: You prefer to learn in groups or with other people.👦🏾👨🏾👦🏿👩🏿👧🏿
  • Solitary: You prefer to work alone and use self-study.👦🏿

(It’s likely that your own personal way of learning is a combination of a few of those above, so focus on which one describes your strongest attributes)

My learning style is Solitary. I would study alone the night before an exam and get an A with no problems. So I never needed a teacher to adjust to me. If your learning style is something else you may need your teacher to change-up how they relay the information to you.

My advice with that is for you to just be straight with them. Tell them that you researched learning styles and that your learning style is “fill in the blank here”. After that a GOOD teacher will do their best to adjust for you. A BAD teacher wont.

Having said that anyone interested in being a better black man will always look to help oneself. And once you understand your learning style you should be able to help yourself with just a little bit more work. Here are a few ways you can do that :

Like anything in life nothing comes from knowledge without the work! Even if you know your learning style succeeding isn’t guaranteed. But I have faith that you will do what you need to do to be better.

Are you ready to be a better man? Fuck with me then!

#Bebetterthanthem

 

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Black Men and Romance (The Plan Part 1)

You know I love the HBO show Insecure. I personally think it is a near perfect depiction of the current state of black relationships. In particular folk 35 and under. Some people would complain that the show is over sexualized. I would say that our relationships are over sexualized so the show got that right. But with all the screwing and love making on the show something important is missing; Romance!

None of the love interests in the show used romance to initiate sex with the main characters Issa and Molly. It almost always begins with a lusty encounter that looks both brief and unsatisfying. Does that sound familiar? Have your most recent intimate encounters involved romance?

Fellas this is mostly our fault! For starters I don’t think black men are the only guys that struggle with intimacy and romance in the bedroom. However, this blog is about making “US” better and that is where my focus lies with all of my posts.

If you ask most black women in America when was the last time they experienced romance in the bedroom, the answer would most likely be “it’s been a long time”. The reason behind this is complex but the short story is that Romance isn’t required anymore to have sex with a woman. They have become accustomed to going without; and now you would be pressed to see instances of romance in the bedroom on TV or anywhere really. That fact should not stop us black men who are interested in doing better though and I am here to help you change the narrative on this topic.

Whether you are single, married or in a committed relationship, romance should ALWAYS be a part of your repertoire; and here are 5 reasons why:

  1. Women love to feel special – telling a woman you love her and that she is special to you is one thing and showing her is another. A man who wants to be better will always do both.
  2. Women love to out do their friends – If you provide a romantic experience that supersedes what her friends have experienced you win.
  3. It’s good for you too – Black Men often have issues with expressing emotion. Being romantic gives you the opportunity to show her how you really feel about her.
  4. Makes you a better lover – I don’t know about you but I personally want to be the best lover in the world. Changing it up and adding romance will definitely make you a better lover. DO IT
  5. IF YOU DON’T DO IT SOMEONE ELSE WILL – If a woman feels neglected in ANY WAY the probability is high that she will seek someone else to fill in those gaps. REMOVE ALL GAPS fellas.

Now I understand that sometimes it’s hard to come up with romantic ideas that are both creative and don’t cost you a bag of dough! But fellas, I am here to help you with a surefire plan that not only sets the new standard for your relationship but will also ensure that her panties are drenched before you even touch her.

THE PLAN (There aren’t too many things more attractive to a woman than a man with a plan)

Situation – This plan is best for those with a significant other but will work in most relationship types. Also, should be used for special occasions like bday, vday, etc.… or randomly (my choice).

Place – Your place. You have all the control over the mood in your own place. Control is king because the one with the control gets the credit!

What does it improve – Romance, Intimacy and Foreplay

What you need:

  • One week Meal Service Box (Hello Fresh, Blue Apron, Etc…)

Hello Fresh Box. Save 70% on a Hello Fresh Meal Plan (Click Here)

  • Fresh organic strawberries – Get these from your local organic food market i.e. Whole Foods, Trader Joes, etc.… black women are ahead on the organic food game and you will get points every time if you have produce from these places.
  • 1 bag of Chocolate Chips and 1 bag of White Chocolate Chips (get the brand that you like the most)

  • 1 Bottle of Wine – For White, get a Moscato (Try getting a unique brand (although she may be happy with a Barefoot wine you should step it up). Anytime you put her on to something new she will remember it forever.

Idea Link: Del Poggio Moscato (Click Here) .

  • If she is more into Red try a bottle of Jam Jar.

Idea Link: Jam Jar (Click Here)

  • For a different look try a Prosecco (Bubbles make her feel good)

Idea Link: Mionetto Prosecco (Click Here)

The Execution

Arrange a simple Netflix and Chill night with your lovely. When ready, put on the playlist and start making the meal together. The TOGETHER part is very important and the meal boxes are great because not only do they give you everything you need, they detail every step you need to take via pictures and video if needed. Take turns doing each step so that each of you are equally involved in preparing the meal. During this stage have normal conversation with just the occasional touch. Also, feel free to have a glass of wine or herb (whichever y’all prefer).

After your meal, it will be time for your dessert which will be chocolate covered strawberries. Now I chose the least expensive and simplest recipe for this but you can get as elaborate as you want with the ingredients here.

How To Make Chocolate Covered Strawberries

Feel free to get as messy as possible during the dessert making process (chocolate covered kisses are the best btw).

After enjoying both the chocolate and chocolate covered strawberries, she is ALMOST ready for the coup de grâce. Play this song from the BBBM Romance Playlist on Spotify or YouTube.

Daniel Ceaser – Get You

Now pull your lovely close and slow dance with her. By the second verse vertical foreplay is in order. By the end of the song the panties should be ready for removal (because they are drenched lol).

Enjoy fellas and if you have any questions about this tip please contact me at bbbmtheblog@gmail.com.

Also, if you are that dude and feel like you need a more advanced plan. Or if you have a special occasion coming up and want to surprise your lovely please hit me up.

Are you ready to be a better man? Fuck with me then!

#Bebetterthanthem